I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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