I think I am morally bankrupt
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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