i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
