is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
