Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
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