Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
