i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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