Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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