Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
