I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Randomize
