Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
