Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
