Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
