in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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