She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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