Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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