I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
