Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
im six kinds of drunk right now
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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