so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
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