I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I see more hoeing in ur future
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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