porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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