just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
