dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
