I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
soo... how was my night?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
