if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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