went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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