highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize