its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize