Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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