Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
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