You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Randomize
