Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Randomize
