She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I am one with the molecules
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
