You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
