i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
