ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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