Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
