i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
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