Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize