Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
