i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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