If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
