she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
