ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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