As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
