Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
