just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize