farters have to be the big spoon...
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Randomize