Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Randomize
