if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
