She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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