After last night, I could never be a politician.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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