i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
