We need to start having sex underwater more often.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I am naked and annoyed.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize